The child is gone, the dream is gone, I am comfortably numb

These words of Pink Floyd from the song "Comfortably Numb" struck a chord in my brain while listening to it the other day. Why does the child in us die? Why don't we feel it dying and try to prevent it? The dreams that we see as a child start to become absurd as we grow up. They change into something less ambitious, less out worldly. Then we settle for dreams that, in our minds, are "achievable" or instead in our parents' or God-forbidden relatives' opinions. Why can't we keep dreaming of becoming an astronaut irrespective of the results?

"Come back to reality." "Be practical." "Come on, be serious." Opinions are a dime a dozen. These murderous phrases silently slit the throats of our dreams as we grew up. They brew doubt in our novice hearts that maybe people are right. Perhaps I shouldn't fly too close to the sun lest I face the fate same as Icarus.

Murders everywhere, every waking minute. Somewhere right now, the dreams, the child inside is getting murdered. Over the dinner table, in social groups, social media, etc. We ignore their screams, and those screams are reduced to whispers in front of the roar of life's realities.

The threat of phrases like "What will you do if not this?", "Have you decided what you are going to do in life?", "You should start thinking about life quickly before it's too late."; created a fear in our hearts that maybe what they are saying is true. If I don't act quickly enough, I will go nowhere in life. And thus, we registered for the race. The infamous "rat race." Learning turned into a target for test scores and milestones. We ran after them, not realizing whether they are own goals or society-sanctioned goals.

Then graduation day came, and we couldn't get enough of "What now?". I feel like this question will never stop haunting us. Graduated. What now?. Got a job. What now? Got married. What now? I think we have lost some integral part of ourselves in pursuing what now.

We stopped being curious. Why do electrons move in a certain way? Why is the law of demand work the way it does? It's not our fault entirely. The system we grew up in did not reward these questions or any curiosity that kindled in a child's mind. It just awarded scores. So slowly, we didn't bother asking such questions. We chased those scores. And we still keep chasing it in different forms. Test scores, job scores, promotion scores, and on and on we go. The prevailing metrics of society have consciously or unconsciously decided our life trajectory, and we rarely notice it, if at all.

What's the point of so much complaining?

It is because I want you to look beyond the veil. I want you to look. But not complain or resent everything and everyone. For we cannot change our past but only learn from it. Getting to terms with your past will give you a perspective of where you want to go. What metrics are you going to use to define your life? I have realized from my own experience that when you look back at the course of your life, you will come across a few pivotal moments. Those moments had a significant impact on your lives. A career path that you chose to pursue, a subject that you chose to study, a person that you helped, a relationship that you fostered, and many more. It can be anything. Those highlights have brought you where you are today. Whether the path was easy, difficult, painful, or happy, that's different. Everyone's life is unique. The important thing is that they happened. They happened, and they are in the past.

Be grateful if the highlights of your life were happy. And be thankful even if they were not. Often in the pursuit of happiness, we demonize pain. We treat happiness as a destination, whereas it is just a phase in the path of our lives. If you look closely, happiness is just a buffer between the pain. It's a high between two lows. Conversely, pain is not permanent, just a low between two highs. Waves of the ocean crash only to rise again. The cycle continues, and so do our lives.

The point of rambling all this was to tell you to say to yourselves that it's okay.

It's okay. At this moment, you have the rest of your lives. However short or long that might be, the past doesn't necessarily need to define your future. Slow down if you are moving too fast; move fast if you feel like you are moving too slow. Define your own metrics of what your life should be. It won't be easy. Pushing against the grain is never easy. But you will find peace in the path because it will be yours and yours only. You will be glad you carved your way and look back at your life with a broad smile on your face.